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The Macalope Weekly: A bad joke

#1 User is offline   Macworld 

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Posted 28 July 2012 - 06:01 AM

Post your comments for The Macalope Weekly: A bad joke here
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#2 User is offline   markbyrn 

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  Posted 28 July 2012 - 06:20 AM

If Clem was such an amazing financial advice wizard, he'd be rich instead of writing link bait on Forbes.
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#3 User is offline   KPOM 

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  Posted 28 July 2012 - 06:26 AM

A link to a Gizmodo article! That's the first in a long time for the Macalope.
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#4 User is offline   danmusician 

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  Posted 28 July 2012 - 06:30 AM

"Without Steve Jobs, Apple Has All The Appeal Of Dell."

I understand these guys make their money slamming Apple, but that's just plain mean!

Also, the entire "Apple blew it because they missed earning estimates even though they had a record quarter" mantra drives me NUTS. Even USA Today, which is often viewed on comment boards as being Apple friendly , ran a headline to the effect of "Apple Earnings Sag." I wish my earnings would sag like that!
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#5 User is offline   LenWilliamsrar3 

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  Posted 28 July 2012 - 06:37 AM

There's a simple rule of thumb that seems to be part of the DNA of the Nostradumbasses (the Macalope's delightful term): During the 80s and 90s Apple was beleaguered and was "doomed" and would die shortly. Then when Apple started to take off with the iPod and iPhone in the 2000s, Apple was "doomed" because the success would be short lived and the products wouldn't catch on. Then when Apple was HUGELY successful with the iPod, iPhone and iPad for more than a decade and overtook Exxon to become the world's most valuable company, Apple was "doomed" because it simply has to come up with yet another exceptional product, which it just can't keep doing. Regardless of what Apple does or doesn't do, in the eyes of certain people, it will always be wrong. And I'm OK with that. There's a lady down the street with 20 cats who talks to telephone poles, and that's OK too. In life you simply have to come to terms with the fact that there are relatively normal people with a modicum of rationality, a few who are insanely brilliant and a small few who are delusional nits that have all the observational ability of a fence post.
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#6 User is offline   jsjjnbrunk 

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  Posted 28 July 2012 - 06:44 AM

Loved it! Laughed so hard I almost dropped my S3!
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#7 User is offline   Paulcalkins 

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  Posted 28 July 2012 - 07:08 AM

Got one for you macalope! Apologies for linking to Rob Enderle but it appears that Google TV is the next Apple killer! http://www.digitaltr...blet-dominance/
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#8 User is offline   dannyo152 

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  Posted 28 July 2012 - 07:21 AM

Working on the algebra, Apple + Jobs = Phenomena -> Apple = Phenomena - Jobs; Apple - Jobs = Normal Company ->
(Phenomena - Jobs) - Jobs = Normal Company, therefore a Normal Company is two Jobs away from being a Phenomena.

So if one is a dissatisfied normal company -- that hellishly deprived entity making payroll and building owner equity -- clearly Job One is get two Jobs. It's Clemtific and Chamberbraic. This is big. Maybe Harvard Business School big.
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#9 User is offline   dannyo152 

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Posted 28 July 2012 - 07:32 AM

Incidentally, why did Chambers use the plural of phenomenon in his key equation? Is this a British collective noun pluralization thing?
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#10 User is offline   Lenjc1957 

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  Posted 28 July 2012 - 07:40 AM

Putting this guy down in my iCal reminders list, along with 'Know Your Mobile,' to see how accurate they turn out to be. By the way, only 10 days left until KYM's live coverage of the unveiling of the 'iPhone 5.'

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#11 User is offline   funcolletorstoo 

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  Posted 28 July 2012 - 07:55 AM

LenWilliamsrar3 said: "and a small few who are delusional nits that have all the observational ability of a fence post."

Alright. Settle down. No need to vent your wrath insulting innocent fence posts. ;)
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#12 User is offline   PowerPC 

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  Posted 28 July 2012 - 08:25 AM

I predict that Mr. Anderson's next blog post will be about how all the Apple fanboys terrorized him because of something they made up called a Macalope.
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#13 User is offline   imccausl 

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  Posted 28 July 2012 - 08:28 AM

WHAT? You didn't have to sign into eWorld when you installed Mountain Lion? You didn't have Gil Amelio materialize in front of you trying convince you to "upgrade" your iMac to a Performa 5200? What version of Mountain Lion DID YOU install, Macalope?
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#14 User is offline   leicaman 

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Posted 28 July 2012 - 08:38 AM

View PostLenWilliamsrar3, on 28 July 2012 - 06:37 AM, said:

Then when Apple was HUGELY successful with the iPod, iPhone and iPad for more than a decade and overtook Exxon to become the world's most valuable company, Apple was "doomed" because it simply has to come up with yet another exceptional product, which it just can't keep doing. Regardless of what Apple does or doesn't do, in the eyes of certain people, it will always be wrong....


And let's take this into consideration too. Apple is now selling more AppleTVs than Microsoft is selling XBoxes. Of course people are waiting for the release of XBox 720s. But then I'm waiting for the next AppleTV!
Eric

Nothing in all the world is more dangerous than sincere ignorance and conscientious stupidity. - Martin Luther King, Jr.
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