[maddad]

Where is a good location to find buddy icons to use with ichat and also backgrounds or themes for osx?

[dcpics]

for iChat icons you can simply to web search on: aim icons
Most icons that will work for AIM will work on iChat.
Pretty much, any jpeg file will work as well. Got a picture of your kids or your pet you really like. You can drop it in.
Or you can scan in a picture of your favorite cartoon character, logo, etc. and put it in.